Before I was a blogger.....

Fair warning, this post might be a little rambling. Over the past couple of weeks I've been thinking about the type of reader I was before I was a blogger. Before I was a blogger, I read approximately 25-30 books per year. Since I started blogging, I read 60+ books per year. Every year I go on Goodreads and sign up for the reading challenge. In my mind, I have to outdo or at least read the same amount of books per year. Before I started blogging, I just picked up whatever caught my attention in the bookstore. I don't think I was aware of when certain books came out. I don't think I paid as much attention to plot and pacing. If I liked it, I liked it. If I didn't, I didn't. I wasn't thinking a particular book would have been better if an author had done X, Y, and Z. Since I've started blogging, it kind of consumes me. I'm also in graduate school for book publishing. When it comes to school, I have to think of books as a business. And....that comes with its own set of challenges. So, I have to have books on the brain 24/7.

Why am I saying this? I don't see myself quitting on my blog any time soon, but I think I'm hitting the wall. The wall that all bloggers hit at some point. Because I'm in school right now, I can't always devote my attention to my blog. I often wonder if I'm doing enough as a blogger. How do I keep it fresh? Is it enough to just post reviews? What else could I be doing? How do other bloggers do it so well? I'm often thinking, why didn't I think of that? Why does another blogger gush over a book that I thought was terrible? That one plays in my mind over and over.

And.....lately blogging is starting to feel like a like job. I'm sure everyone who blogs feels like that at some point. But this isn't my job. If it was, I would be in heaven. If book blogging was my job, I would be devoting as much time as possible to make this the best blog possible. But that just isn't the case. Publishers, publicists, authors, and others send me what sounds like a great book, but sometimes it's just not for me. I feel guilty if I don't read a book fast enough. I also hate to say I don't like a book. I hate to not finish a book, but sometimes I have to give up. When I don't finish a book, I feel like I've broken my obligation. But again this isn't my job and I do this in my spare time. But I can't escape the feeling that I'm letting someone down if I don't finish a book.

I hope at least some of this makes sense. I think I just needed to vent a little bit. Everybody is different, but sometimes I wish I could be more unique with my blog.

P.S.: Don't worry, I will be posting some reviews soon. I have a couple coming up with TLC Book tours!!